Lack of Respect

When children lack respect, relationships suffer. Disrespect can be hurtful and embarrassing. It’s important to teach children to be respectful in words and actions toward parents, other adults, and even toward each other. Respect focuses acting in a kind and humble way when interacting with others. It includes things like manners, greetings, and proper conversation techniques. Children need to learn how to show respect in practical terms so clearly define what is appropriate and what is not.

At the same time you teach about respect, be sure to also teach children about honor. We say that respect is external and shows good behavior, but honor comes from the heart. It’s a way of showing value to others. Honoring goes beyond respect behavior. Because it's so important in family life, we have developed a curriculum about honor. The book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, in You and Your Kids teaches children that honor treats people as special, does more than what’s expected and has a good attitude. Honor changes people because it focuses on the heart. The CD series, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, in You and Your Kids contains recordings of eight live seminars taught by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN, teaching about honor. The children’s program called The Kids Honor Club is for children ages 3-12. It contains Bible stories, crafts, games, and activities teaching children how to live out honor in very practical terms.

Many parents find it quite difficult to focus only on respect and wish their children would change on the inside. That’s why teaching about honor is so important.

Some children need more than just a positive approach however. Disrespect often needs to be met with a good correction plan. If that’s the case in your home, you’re likely going to need a number of tools that lead to true repentance. When it comes to correction we would recommend the Heart Work Training Manuals and CDs. This kit contains eight lessons for parents, all focused on heart-based parenting. Three of the lessons address correction and provide you with specific strategies that will prompt heart change, not just behavior change. In particular, you’ll want to listen to the CD and work through the workbook entitled A Toolbox of Consequences. It contains seven categories of consequences and gives you specific ideas for using them to change the heart.

Children who have a problem with disrespect often have problems with anger and a bad attitude as well. Look for ways to address these challenges. Don’t just ignore them. A child’s heart is so important and requires persistent training in order to develop in the right direction.