Where is the Best Place for Me to Start?

Welcome to the National Center for Biblical Parenting. We’re glad you found us. No matter why you’re here or what issues you’re facing with your child, you want to start with the heart. For many, that’s a new way of thinking. Sure, it sounds good but what is the heart and how is parenting from a heart perspective different than what others do?

Those are good questions. The reality is that most of us were raised with behavior modification. Behavior modification is a strategy for working with kids that says things like, “If you clean your room, you can have a friend over” or “If you finish your homework, you can go out and play.” Basically behavior modification says, “If you do what I say, you can have what you want.” This external rewards approach to changing behavior appeals to and encourages a child’s selfishness. It’s not long before children figure out the system and say, “What are you going to give me if I do what you say?” or they asked the question, “Will I get paid for this?”

Discipling Parents in the Art of Heart Work
There’s a different way to think about parenting. It starts with the heart. The heart contains the operating principles of a person. In fact, we did a study of over 750 times the word “heart” is used in the Bible and we asked the question, “What does God say the heart is and how do we parent our children with a “heart” perspective?” The study revealed a number of significant differences between a behavior modification approach and a heart-based approach to parenting. If you’d like to read more about that study and its results, take a look at the book Parenting is Heart Work.

In addition, the Heart Work Training Manuals and CDs provide you with hands-on strategies to address the most common interactions in parenting. Use this curriculum for yourself or meet with another parent to grow together. You might even want to disciple other parents who want help. This curriculum is a great tool for developing a new way to think about parenting.

You’ll learn how to help children develop positive heart qualities as you interact with them in the daily routines of life. The way you give instructions, correct children, and help them accept no as an answer all have implications for heart development. You’ll learn about attitude, how to change what children believe, and how to connect with your kids on a heart level. When parents ask us, “Where do I start with your materials, we recommend the resources that address the heart. You’ll likely want more strategies and ideas but it’s best to start with the heart to see lasting change in your child’s life.

One of the great rewards of working on the heart is that you’re preparing children for life. The strategies we develop for children take adult solutions and break them down to the developmental stages of children. So as you use our resources you’ll be helping children develop life-long skills and patterns.

You’ll also see that we use the scripture throughout our resources. We do that because we believe that the Bible is rich with practical truths for family life. If you’re not accustomed to using the Bible to help you with family issues, you’ll want to do so. The Bible has a way of changing a child’s heart because it addresses beliefs. It’s Hebrews 4:12 that says, “For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

Spend some significant time in prayer for your child. We recommend that you pray for your child everyday. As you do, you’ll see God work in your child’s heart and you’ll find yourself better prepared spiritually to face the challenges of the day.

As you look around our site, we pray that God will bring you to the right resources to help you in your situation. If you have any questions, please feel free to give us a call and we can guide you to the solutions that may be best for you.